Transsexual fantasies

 

Note: all the text, bellow, have been translated by “Google Translator”. Sorry for all errors of translation.

 

Transsexualism could be better made by describing fantasies of transsexual people.

This testimony below may, perhaps, help to better understand where some of these fantasies:

 

"Am I a normal person? I want to be a good person, a correct person. I thoroughly involved in humanitarian work. But I have strange sexual desires, I can remove my head and if I might finally sated make me look for someone "deviant (s)" [if not a well person], to eyes of right-thinking people. Since small (or very small, since the age of 7 years), I still have strong sexual desires. Whenever I have intense sexual desires, I have a strong desire to vagina, between the legs, strong desires of women, to be submitted by a mistress-wife, a dominant woman or extreme fantasies (brief truly transsexual desires for a man). Here is what I wrote for example, to a friend, Muriel, herself a transsexual, super nice, feminine, for which (her), I have always had great affection and respect:

 

She wrote to me, "You're finally going to do?"

 

And then I made him the following answer:

 

"Dear Muriel,

 

Yes, I want to be operated (e).

I would accompany you for my operation?

If not, would you know (maybe?) Help me solve this problem below?

 

Due to the new regulations from a Department of Health Department applied for Thai surgeons to perform sex change surgery, candidates require SRS letter of recommendation from either a psychiatrist or a registered psychologist (the letter d a counselor or therapist or endocrinologist will not be acceptable) that must be sent to me by e-mail in jpeg or pdf file for approval.

 

The original SRS recommendation letter issued psychiatrist or a registered psychologist with his / her signature must be provided at the time of the consultation.

The original documents must be presented the day of your consultation.

 

This is the biggest problem.

 

Because if I want to have a woman's body, with vagina, breasts (wide hips) (totally hairless), but I can not, for cons, change of clothing habit (I just pants, sneakers or runings ...) or change of identity.

I always feel ambiguous in identity, half-man half-woman. Do not want to change roles in the day.

During the day, no desire, but when I'm lying, the night the desire is strong.

And that's difficult to explain to a psychologist or psychiatrist (and this can be a strong reason for SRS).

 

The desire to vaginoplasty has always been strong at home (over my sexual desire is stronger, this desire is strong. My goal ... is finally able to feel sexual pleasure).

friendships,

 

B. ».

 

She had replied:

 

« Hello,

Why not…

I do not understand your biggest problem is finding 2 shrink?

It is not the therapist who fails to Paris ... you should be seeing this with the association to have addresses ... I see no more for a long time ...

On this canvas again when?

Sincerely,

Muriel ».

 

And I answered her:

 

« Dear Murielle,

I saw a shrink of a health center near my home, rue Ordener, Mr Baret ... early July. He said something like I asked him a case of conscience (or as if I "provoquais").

I have not felt at home someone sympathetic (I have seen several in the past ... Dintran at Tenon Hospital, hostile ... and several other badly disposed with my desire).

To be honest with you, and it's not easy to explain, it's every time I have sexual desire (strong, powerful, titillating ... "taraudants ...") that this desire is strong vagina.

For example, in the past, I had very strong desires for you, certainly ... maybe because you are a person rather nice and generous. In fact, in cases like this, when I meet a very friendly person, I have an affection for it, sometimes later _ _ I can have strong desires and a strong attraction for her.

But as you're married with Lucia, it is now ancient history.

Good day.Benj ».

 

In fact, I dare not say that, despite the power of my sexual desire vagina, I am faced with many fears:

 

1) The vaginoplasty is not successful and that I do not get vaginal and clitoral pleasure I strongly desire (associated with a function of natural lubrication, my vagina, whenever I desire, lubrication increases fun. Also, I like a deep vagina, to experience maximum sexual pleasure).

2) One fears to social prejudice because changing sexes is like crossing a barrier and often absolute taboo in many people. And transsexuals have already made assaulted. It is the fear of being impersonate crazy (or crazy) or a disturbed person from my contemporaries. In addition, I feel transgender _ in my identity, half man and half woman _ and not pure transsexuals ... and the therapist that grant authorization for the operation of sex change operation and the change Vital, maybe my dam will change sex and marital status (especially since I have 60 years and I may have already waited too long (?)). All this is not easy. At this complexity, I often want to remain human in appearance but have a vagina. And if I need to hide that I have a vagina, so I wear a prosthetic penis credible, for example in order to cross borders. And I do not totally want to be a woman passing in the background before men, in Muslim countries and backward or retrograde (in terms of social and human progress).

3) The hostility and rejection from my family (father and brother, who are aware and, therefore, have already rejected me).

4) It's a tough operation (painful) [one makes the removal of the penis can keep the hands testicles that's not always the case]. I am still in full health. But after 60 years, this operation Will it not be harder?

5) Do I have the right to "mutilate" my male sex and even put me back "the whole world" to finally feel real sexual pleasure? (not by proxy, only in his head, using his imagination and fantasies?).

Muriel était au courant que j’avais écrit à un chirurgien, spécialisé dans la « réassignation sexuelle » en Thaïlande et voici ce qu’il m’avait répondu [voici, ci-après, la traduction de son mail, ci-après] :

 

« Dear Benjamin

 

No problem, please find the SRS requirement and scheduling information along with patient medical information below.

 

Due to the new regulation from a Health Ministry Department applied for Thai surgeons to perform sex reassignment surgery, SRS candidates require the letter of recommendation from either psychiatrist or licensed psychologist (the letter from counselor or therapist or endocrinologist will be not acceptable) which need to e-mail me in jpeg or pdf file for approval.

 

The original SRS recommendation letter issued from psychiatrist or licensed psychologist with his/her signature must be provided at consultation time.

The original documents must be presented on your consultation day.

 

The recommend length of stay for SRS is between 25-30 days and please plans to arrive 3-4 days prior your surgery for the process of consultation, complete all paper works & payment and start bowel cleansing schedule.

 

The package price for SRS is 327,000 THB The package price for SRS+ Breast implant is 437,000 THB (standard implant size between 200 cc- 450 cc) The package price for SRS+ Breast implant (standard) +Trachea shave is 495,000 THB If the selected size of breast implant is larger than 450cc, there will be an extra charge of 10,000 THB.

 

To review all procedures we offer and price list please see the link below

 

…..

 

Calculation the surgical fee in your own currency Please be advised that the price shown in the website is fixed in Thai Baht to avoid fluctuation of the currency. You can simply use the online currency converter to estimate the price in your currency, for example go to ….

 

The package price includes doctors and nurses fees, operation fees, overnight stay for post operation at our surgery center, daily nurses visitation at the hotel (except on Sunday), medication fee, follow up fee and free transportation from airport to hotel and our surgery center. In brief it doesn't includes hotel accommodation expense and air fare. You will also receive 50% discount price from our affiliated hotel.

 

Scheduling your surgery

 

Please fill out the personal medical form (in the attachment) and send back to us before scheduling the surgery so we can learn more about you. You can also review our general requirement for lab tests and x-ray which included in the form as well.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                

 

You can inform me your preferred month of surgery, I’ll check our schedule and give you the available date. I am looking forward to hearing back from you.

 

Regards,

 

J….

Business Manager

 

Plastic Surgery Center

Bangkok, Thailand

 ».

 

There's a shrink, I'm very interested, Mr. Vincent B., resident in Paris, I would like to meet good, precisely because it seems open-minded and that he led research on "gender clinic in Psychoanalysis" and published on trans and gay identity issues, sexuation identities.

 

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